Stop Divorce And Get A Second Chance On Your Marriage
Your relationship is headed for divorce even though you have been married for a number of years. You would like to put a stop to the divorce if possible because even though the romance is gone, a lot of time has been invested in your marriage by both of you.
‘Not finding the right person, it is falling in love with the person you selected’; this is the key to a long lasting successful marriage according to Mort Fertel who is a world authority on the psychology of relationships.
An emotional response to a strong attraction to a person is dubbed as falling in love. The spontaneous response to the intellectual, physical and emotional appeal between people is a more accurate summary.
But you have to work actively on loving someone. You have to give time, effort and energy to the relationship for sustaining that loving feeling towards the person you are married to.
It is likely that you and your spouse are responsible if the ‘bloom is off the rose’. You lose or misplace the promise of what began with such extreme passion if you don’t apply yourself to the relationship.
It is completely possible that the romance can be rekindled in your lives and passion be revived. You can end up being happier than ever with the person whom your heart selected as your mate and put a stop to your divorce.
You must uproot those factors that are pushing you to divorce in order to put a stop to it. Eliminate as much negatives as possible from your relationship.
Sure its possible that you will fall in love with someone again and connect with someone if your divorce occurs. But you will find yourself in the same boat as you are now and heading for another divorce if you don’t learn the lessons you need to sustain your love.
What first attracted you to your partner? Probability is high that underneath all the baggage that one or both of you have added to the relationship by not doing what is necessary to stay in love, the same person exists.
A two part list should be made by both which discuss the things they like about their partner and their marriage and the things they dislike if they both are amenable to it. Do it on your own if your partner is not willing.
Discuss just yours or both of your lists. Many of the negative issues will seem trivial when the good and bad sides of your marriage are exposed. But they can become a millstone around your necks when taken together.
To change the facets of your relationship that you don’t like, make a joint commitment. Or commit to reduce them to an extent that they can be outweighed by the positives in your marriage.
Reaffirm each other once again
Form a pact that you will talk and think about your partner and marriage in a positive manner with other people and each other as well. Tell each other that you love them and show off the good side of your characters.
You will be in love if you practice being in love as its rather simplistic. You will fan the fires of your passion again and sustain your relationship. Your marriage will be a negative one if you spend time dwelling on its negatives.